Google's Sense of Humor

I ran an image search for "factory closed," and it sent me this.  Google, you so cray-zee

A note on marathons

As you must certainly know, I am no runner.

Even at the gym, where I'll try nearly anything, you are not going to get me to run.  It only took hyperventilating once in the 300 yrd dash for me to determine that is not natural.  President's Council my aaaa....***** 

Anyway, no need to get all wound up.  The Marathon I am speaking of is a metaphorical one, which culminates today as National Blog Post Month comes to its blissful and headachy end.   I hear so many of you talk about the mini-marathons you have entered, and the weekend 10Ks you are training for, and I said, well "tip o' the hat and god bless ye."  I'll be over here obsessively writing about it.  You have your pointless round trips to nowhere, and I have mine.  I expect we each do it because it hurts so good and we feel good at it.

Like you, I did a lot of planning -- that is, I actually listed 30 topics, and I had to pre-schedule some.  There were a couple of hard-training weekends, where I wrote a few in a day and laid them out.  Some turned out to be bigger than I had time for, so they will show up later.  I don't want to give them away now. Others I just found the meat in after the title:

• The fact that U of NM's yearbook used to be called The Swastika
• Peter the Great's cabinet full of dead animals in party clothes
• Squire Friddell, the Toyota Salesman for Life
• Kids Who Climb on Rocks.  (seriously, I had nothin after that - I found myself singing the Armour Hot Dog song, and thought -- how is that a category of kid?  And... who eats Armour hot dogs?  ew)
• A pile of repressed 70s memories topics you'll see later on
• And another attempt at the oldest unfinished essay in my draft pile -- 2007's The Hungry Gospel, which attempts to reconcile why The Gospel of John has no Last Supper in it. 

And unlike you (I imagine) I did not train every day and I didn't always give it my best.  I could have used a more driving soundtrack and a little less Power Bar.  I may have twisted a knee.  Or the truth.  But I made it to the finish line.

Lessons learned from this Marathon are that you may be more surprised than anyone when you kick it at the end and break the tape, even if you soil yourself in the attempt.

I will not be here tomorrow.  I can promise you that.  I am not gone forever.  But Miss Bender is behind on her filing.

Today's Writing Prompt

Look, I don't have space for an all-nighter.  Not when I still have to manage today's email before it becomes yesterday's email (Take Back Your Life) and fight the system on finding a flight to Va that doesn't require a pre-dawn departure, a shuttle to Boston, a 3 hour layover in Newark, a connection through anything west of the Cumberland Gap, or $700.  I am not getting to bed on time as it is.

So, yeh, I went to the prompts list.  Wanna  make somethin of it?

The question is

If you could have worked for anyone in history, in your field, who would you choose and why?


My..... "field".....

Which is, what, exactly?
When I was In The Field, we called it The Field, and the world was divided into those IN and those OUT.  Just today I was asked for advice by someone looking to get IN.  I wrote "I've been out for quite a while, but you might try S***.  She's still in the field."
 
When we were all unemployed (not this past time, the time before), we agreed to stop asking people "And what do you do?" because we realized what an awkward question that is.  I tend to open these days with "Where do you live?"  or "How do you know the bride?"  I actually say "the bride" no matter the situation.  It's not really that funny; it's all in the delivery.
 
When people ask me what I do, I answer depending on what they are looking for.  If I think they are networking, I'll name the mill that gives me the paycheck.  But it does mean defining my silly "field."  I'm not even convinced it makes sense as a role, but it comes with certs, so yeh, I guess it's a field.  I wouldn't even want to work for me in that field.
 
If I think they want a good story, I go with describing things for blind people.  If I think they want to talk about themselves. I'll say I'm a homocide detective.
 

When is it a "field," and when is it a "discipline"?  I miss "Game."  "So what game are you in?"  "I'm in ladies undergarments."  "You said it, brother."  
 
You'll notice I didn't answer the question.  I never intended to.
I can't wait for  Dec 1.

The error message

Internet Explorer has closed this webpage to help protect your computer
A malfunctioning or malicious add-on has caused Internet Explorer to close this webpage.


What you can do:
Go to your home page
Try to return to facebook.com

This should be an app.  I could get behind this.   Something that warns me of Malicious Add Ons.  Life is full of them.

As we get closer to the day when hologram pop-ups appear before our eyes telling us There is a Toyota Sale-a-Thon , we could use pop-ups that warn us who to stay away from.  (From whoooom to stay away.)

I like the helpful advice also.  You can Go Home.  or you can return to the shallow 2-d relationships that are easier to manage.

Talk about jumping on a craze...

Crest 3D?  Really....?  

Joke's on you, Crest, because I remembered it as Colgate 3D, and so did a number of other people, judging by the search results.  But we'll get to them in a minute.  They are not off the hook.  But you.  You got some 'splainin' to do.

Crest used to make its living making promises about our cavities.  Now they seem  determined to make us feel bad about the color of our teeth.  They are just not WHITE enough, says Crest.  Now they want them to pop right out of our head and through the Quidditch goal, it seems.


Enough with 3-D mania.  Life is ALREADY in 3D.  We are not idiots.  But since you bothered to write your "story," I'll humor you.

"Crest and Oral-B offer the transformative power of a 3D White smile to people everywhere, without the confusion or trade-offs of other whitening products available today, and with the health benefits you expect from Crest and Oral-B."

People EVERYWHERE.    


What does this mean: "...without the confusion or trade-offs..."?  You mean how I mixed you up with Colgate?  You must get that all the time.  And just tell me how do you remove "the confusion"?  You don't really say.

How dumb they think we are:  (real quotes)

• "CREST 3D WHITE WHITESTRIPS WILL ONLY WHITEN NATURAL TEETH."   (all caps.  They are tired of answering this particular FAQ.)
• "Do not use with dental braces."

• "They contain high performance polymers...."  (Oohhh... polymers.  You are so space age. )

Best irony Moment:  They are very proud of their reviews on DailyCandy.com

Too bad DailyAppleAndANiceGlassOfTapWater couldn't help them out.

I never found out what the 3Ds stand for.  I think it just beat out "low carb,"  "Green"  and "iTeeth" in the marketing meeting.

Stay right where you are, Colgate.  You're in this too.  Know how I know?

Because I should never need help choosing my toothpaste.

There are so many varieties on the Colgate page that I can't actually show it to you.

That says "Caribbean Cool."  To hell with everything; I'm just going to chew toothpaste as gum.  And follow with a bubble-gum flavored flouride rinse.

Do not confuse your Caribbean Cool with Paradise Fresh, which is "Sparkling gel in brilliant gemstone colors of Aquamarine and Amethyst." 

 Did you know Colgate still makes UltaBrite?
It's Farrah's brand.  

When I asked why they still make it, it was not one of the FAQs.

Your 2010 Wish Book

Economics has a way of making sure we can't really afford the crazy crap we want when we want it.  By the time you can afford the bacon and egg pajamas, you kind of don't want them anymore.  This happens more slowly for women, because we maturely more quickly and earn more slowly. 
Now is the perfect time to buy the must-have items you couldn't get your hands (or your wallet around) when you wanted them the first time.  Maybe this will put your iPad purchase into some whimsical perspective.

My thanks to the Vintage Ad Browser, where I just spent an hour instead of thinking up my own content.
My thanks to eBay for stocking everything we wasted money on.

Character Telephones  - characters in illustration are larger than they appear.  I was referring to the leg warmers.  Current eBay selling price on the Garfield phone -  $10 - $70.  Lacks caller ID.  But they taught us earlier our phones should be FUN!  And that they were thinking up something for that # key.

The Bone Fone  - official brand name for the "neck stereo headphones."  I just wish I could listen to music while I'm boogie skating.  When will they crack the code on that?  One pair available on eBay for $50.

The Swatch -  we probably all got these in a stocking one year or another.  Explain to your kids what a watch was, and how you didn't have to dig it out of your pocket and turn it on to know what time it was.
26,000 swatches on eBay.  Better narrow your search.  This might help.

A COMPUTER - It will cost the nest egg, but he'll get into Stanford, honey!
16K.  I don't know how I'll fill it.

The Clamshell  - Maybe you are more the laptop type.  I'll say this for Apple -- they have never been afraid to cannibalize their own products if it made them better.  And less embarrassing looking.

"Fully loaded" is still pretty specs, including a 20 GB hard drive for under $300.  If your iPod just feels too small.

The Jacket 
I smell Halston.

Available in nylon or leather models and all your favorite jewel-tone shades.  Roughly $150-200.  Doesn't this look like the Star Trek crew on shore leave?

The Coat 
Oh, the animals you would kill... as soon as you cashed out.

Avon Collectibles  For the man who has everything.  Except another man.

Garth Brooks Shirt  - see also Cosby Sweater

There are 9 bids this minute on the Roper XL Texas flag style.  Bidding closes tomorrow, and is $30 at this posting.  Better get in there.  Roper the wind.

Other, less desirable, Roper shirts.

Le Car
On the other hand... 39 Highway..... hmmmmmmm

Brunch with Jesus

"Jesus said to them, 'Come and have breakfast.'"  ~~ John 21:12

 In those games where you name 5 dinner guests, people often throw Him in.  "and... Jesus, I guess...."  Always mixing him in with Lincoln, Einstein, Betty Friedan...  I'd be more inclinced to leave him off the list.  Not because I have brunch with Jesus every day already, which I do, but because he is not a particularly gracious dinner guest.

He tells long rambly stories that have no punchline, and has a tendency toward outbursts of anger and name-calling when challenged.  He also doesn't help with the dishes.

Jesus' own 5 dinner guests in this game will be the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind, and... "Aristotle, I guess...." he'll throw in. 

Here's an interesting juxtaposition to ponder:  Jesus has to knock on the door of your heart, but your house he'll just invite himself to.

"oo, wait, a tax collector.  I need one of those.  Ok, Lose Aristotle."

The caption isn't entirely fair.  We know he ate fish, but we also know (as any well-raised Baptist will tell you) he ate what was set before him (Luke 10), even if it was topped with mini marshmallows.  Funny thing is, we don't see Jesus eat much.  He serves a lot of food, he interrupts a lot of meals --  including his own -- to rail against Pharisees, who also apparently barge right in wherever they like.

After Jesus' return, " he asked them, 'Do you have anything here to eat?' (Luke 24) "They gave him a piece of broiled fish,  and he took it and ate it in their presence."   He has a little nosh, and he walks with them to Bethany, site of another of his favorite dinner parties (and one stunning dead-raisin') but ascends before the first course.  Aristotle expected him 8-ish.

Enjoy your feast.  Serve ye, one another.

Today in the History of this Blog

How random are the designs of the drawing in room.

Here's what we have rolled out Nov 24 these past years:

2006:  Ned Nickerson: Emersonian, in which we muse about Nancy Drew's backup singers.

2007:  TI Humor (actually Nov 25.  Not a NaBlo Year)  The very young Repressed 70s Memories series spells BOOBS on a calculator.  Short-sleeved business dress optional.

2008:  Mild Innuendo:  Kids in Mind finds sex in a Disney film where you didn't see it.

2009: thirtysomething in retrospect.  I start rewatching one of our culture's awesome artifacts.


2010:  I go on vacation and post this cheat.  sue me.

Speaking of things coming out of the archives...

This seems to be the month for it.  We began with a rant about Disney manipulating the market for their own devices, then just the other day a celebration of the Soul Train collection (scroll down), and here comes

The Warner Archive

Remember how I said I wasn't going to collect any more movies in any new formats?  Do you?  Because I can't hear a thing while I am staring at this.    This.    THIS

Here's how Warner's is competing.  They closed the stores (they were fun, but the era of logo wear and cell art may be behind us), they shut down the catalog (no promises, here.  Manager's choice) and they don't maintain a warehouse.  They burn on purchase, or you can download it. They don't restore anything.  They figure you are willing to buy a bootleg at the collectible show; it might as well be from them.

And they change it up Often, to keep you coming back for more.  But look on Netflix too, because they know what they are up against.

Warner Archive passes the Bad Ronald test.

Caroline Bender's Least Expected Finds and Morbid Curiosities in the Warner Archive (Best of Everything was a Fox picture)

# War and Military - Monty Clift as a GI who adopted a death camp runaway
# TV Movies & Series - Champions: a Love Story 
# Silent Films - The Boob.  How do you not love that?  Here's the plot.  Farm boy Peter Good’s best gal runs off with a bootlegger. So the hapless boob goes running after them…and straight into culture-clash farce that pits his hick heroism (patterned after the actions of granite-jawed cowpokes seen on local Bijou screens) against the wiles of slick-haired gangsters and gin-soaked jazz babies. I almost left out: Joan Crawford in 1926.
# Cult, Sci-Fi & Horror - They Only Kill Their Masters - the Boys of Brazil as played by Dobermans
# Comedy - Ten Thousand Bedrooms.  Martin goes solo without Lewis.

And certainly someone we all know needs this:  

Bookfinder

When you are around your Thanksgiving table trying to deflect conversation onto something less... provocative... try this.

Do you know the most often searched out of print title, according to Bookfinder.com?

Bookfinder is a search engine for the books you can't find elsewhere.  Really, it just conglomerates...or aggregates... or whichever is correct-erates the other book dealer sites so you don't have to, and that is certainly convenient.

Just like DrawingIn.

Who's behind Bookfinder?  "BookFinder.com is an independent subsidiary of AbeBooks, which is based in Victoria, Canada."  so says their "About" page.  Which mostly made me wonder.... what the heck is an "independent subsidiary"?  Then I remembered what I was doing.

Is it free?  Free to search -- search away.  It's a search engine's search engine.

How does it make money?  Beats the hell out of me.

Can I search foreign titles?  You can.  You can also search dealers in foreign lands, lucky you.  Bookfinder is based in Berkeley, CA, and Justbooks, the European wing, comes out of Dusseldorf, Germany.

Why is "Dusseldorf" such a funny word?  Beats the hell out of me.

So how's the usability?  Pretty good.  Search by title, author, keyword, ISBN and get a list of titles as a result.  Click titles to see dealers.  This makes for a clean search result set you can truly browse. 

Prices?  Odd - most of these book dealers with give the book away for a dollar or less, but the shipping can be about $5.  The price you see is a total, so no secrets.  Hover to see the item price vs s/h.  Dealers provide a statement of the book's condition, but you can't see it.  After that, all rules for buying used crap online are in effect.  Big win -- you can buy the 3rd edition of a text book for about 60% less than the current 4th edition and often get a new copy.

On the other hand, economics are economics, and the rarer and more sought-after the title, the higher the price.

What does it lack?
Amazon is still best at the "look inside!" feature (and the most enthusiastic).  I found it necessary to cross-check the sites to see if the book I was buying had the content I was looking for.  There is no "cart," because this is a search engine.  So you may create multiple orders (even from a single dealer) from all your searching.  So keep that orientation in mind and make your own spreadsheet or word doc off to the side if you want to minimize your orders.

Are you going to answer Cliff's trivia question?  I am.

 Recognize it?  $200 resale value - MIP -- $600 autographed.  Origional cover price $49.95 1992.

That's Sex by Madonna, and I have just upped the search count to get that graphic.

Other top draws in the past year, according to Bookfinder.com
Promise me Tomorrow, by Nora Roberts.  There's a Nora Roberts book out of print?  How can that be?  Your goal as a writer should be to become so prolific you can tell your publisher to stop printing the books you yourself don't like, even though you are a big cash cow.  The Principles of Knitting - because we are poor and it is cold.  A Treasury of Great Recipes, by Mary and Vincent Price.  Damn, now I want this too.

Soul Train

#30 in an occasional series of repressed 70's memories that turn out to be true.

Stop me if you've heard this:  Soul Train is now on DVD.

Right ON. 

I will let the Soul train site do its own selling.  Loads of merch, an on-screen video jukebox, ya'll, and a nine CD box set.  Run tell dat, Bandstand.

Now, I won't re-write history.  I did adore Bandstand.  Dick Clark is a puppet, but dance contest, rate-a-record, clumsy interviews, showing the giant record sleeve.... all fantastic.  what it didn't have....

was SOUL.

In the town of my roots, where we were newly integrated, but still mostly separated, Bandstand and Soul Train ran back to back.  So you could get the info you needed to move between your two worlds.  Some things crossed lines:  Welcome Back Kotter, Now & Laters, Soul Train. 

You could learn disco on either program, you could get fashion advice for the suburbs or the city.  But you could only learn funk on Soul Train.  the Bump.  Pop n Lock.  The Robot.  White guys on bandstand doing the robot looked silly.  Well, they looked silly because of the part down the middle of their heads, but suspenders and platforms didn't help.

Understand that Bandstand grew into the 70s; Soul Train was born in them.  Bandstand was already your parents' weekend afternoon pop music dance show, at a time when that was a Thing.  Soul Train would earn that distinction later, by staying past the prom into 2000-god help us - SIX.  But in its time... oh, in its time.

If you need the funk (got to have that funk) queue up Vol. 1 today.  Zip on your ankle boots and puff out your Bern Nadette Stanis popcorn pigtails.  Cause the Train is pulling into the station.

Captain Currency

This showed up in my handful of change.  Usually I don't pay any attention to pennies.  I literally leave them on the nearest flat surface as I walk away.  If you ever spot a little stack of pennies on a public counter, or a parking barrier, oddly crammed between bricks in a wall, that's me.  I'm not a penny hater; I'm a public hoarder.

Different post.

What is the US Mint's motivation to keep changing the currency designs?  Does it really prevent counterfeiting?  Because I never saw anything more fake looking than this shiny, nearly PINK, coin with Captain America's shield on it.

It's like a Mardi Gras souvenir.  I might have thought it was counterfeit if it weren't so easy to find in-depth propaganda  information without leaving my house.

The 2010 penny has its own website.  They really need to up the price on these domain names.  Once here, you will learn that this design is called the Union Shield.  You will learn how it defeated its competitor designs, including the Screamin' Eagle and the Capital Dome.  You will learn that it was selected by the Citizens Coinage Advisory Committee.  And you may stop there -- only because you know that I won't.

The website that took you inside the cutthroat business of stamp selection is here to lead you through another door.  Could you all... crouch behind this tiny shield...please...


Is the Citizens Coinage Advisory Committee new?  Yes, in fact.  Since 2003,  they have been advising the Treasury on design ideas.

Hasn't the Treasury been awfully busy lately?  Haven't they just.  Good thing we have this crew to keep the money we don't have interesting to look at.

Who are they?  to quote Coin Update News:

• one specially qualified in numismatic collection curation;
• one specially qualified in the medallic arts or sculpture;   (medallic, they said)
• one specially qualified in American history; 
• one specially qualified in numismatics;
• three individuals representing the interests of the general public; and
• four individuals recommended by the Leadership of both the House of Representatives and Senate (who seem to have no other contributing value)

 What happens when they stop being polite....and start being Real?

Can I be one?  You CAN!  They serve four year terms as "Special Government Employees."  I hope there is a lapel pin.

Do we really care about coins that much?  I can tell you I found a buffalo nickel in my own pocket the other day and got disproportionately excited about it.  I know I was initially excited about the state quarters, but for pity's sake -- there are just so many of them.  There are more coming, too, because Special Government Employees have cleared the way for an "America the Beautiful" series.  Apparently the state series was so "successful."

What makes a coin design successful?  We hoard a lot of them?  I guess the numismatic community gets jazzed about them?  Or is it that it wasn't booed out of the park the way Eisenhower and Anthony dollars were?  If consumers don't hand them back to the cashier and say "do you have the other kind?"

Every few years there is a story about getting rid of the penny, but it just keeps getting a face lift.  Lincoln was the first real person we put on our money and that wheat design does feel like a B-side.  But we lived with it until the New Frontier, when the Lincoln Memorial replaced it.  On a really new penny you can actually SEE Lincoln in his chair between the pillars; the detail of that die is remarkable.

In the past 5 years, the penny has come in for its close-up.  4 designs were added, depicting different stages of Lincoln's life -- none of the ones you immediately think of, because that would be too controversial: Lincoln inspecting Gettysburg's blood-soaked hillsides, Lincoln writing the Emancipation Proclamation, Lincoln in the theatre box....  Lincoln stooping to fit on the same penny as Stephan Douglas....

And now, "the Union Shield,"  -- easier to hold in your hand than the Capitol Rotunda.  And you don't have to tilt your head so far back.

Explain this, then

How does it being Friday help the cat?

Do Firemen only come on Friday?
Is there a demolition planned?

Is this the cat's job?

I know it's a metaphor, but of what?  We just hang on until the whistle blows, then we....? fall?  ooof.  feels like it.

This week-at-the-mill goes back a couple of weeks, I think.  I don't remember much.  But now it is vacation time. 

And your humble narrator leaves you on auto-pilot with what she hopes are timeless diversions to get you through Bring Your Own Plate and 4 starches-make-a-meal.  Happy handprint Turkey.

Hang On, Monday's coming.

Great American Smokeout

It is Smokeout Day.  How's that working for you?

35 years ago the American Cancer Society challenged us to quit for a day.  And trust me, 35 years ago, we needed it.  In my boutique Yankee Candle scent (called  "Have a Nice Day,") brimming beanbag ashtray is the bass note.

Everything smelled of smoke.  And growing up in Virginia, we mean everything.  The grocery store.  The bank.  Those crazy beehives.  You had a separate wardrobe just for going out.  And you don't want to hear about the workplace.

At Simmons, it was famously said "Smokers are friendlier people."  Being forced outside is the great melting pot, and you'd better believe that if the Boss smokes, the smokers have an In you do not have.

In spite of that opening, this is not my Main Idea.  In the style of Freshman Composition, I am going to state an opening, then transition into a different idea.  (Why do they do that?)  And it is this:

Give the Smokers their day.  They are either trying to smoke-out, in which case they are a little jittery today and probably constipated.  Back off.  If they are still smoking on Smoke-Out Day, they don't need to hear it out of you.  If they have come here for a little distraction, I endeavor to provide.

The Drawing In Room's Positive Thoughts About Smoking, Which Will Totally and Eventually Kill You, Sucks Your Budget Dry, and  is Just Plain Gross, But We Get It.

Smoking Paraphrenalia is terribly compelling.  The kitschier, the better.  Giant table lighters, guest cigarette boxes, ashtrays.  How we purloined those round glass ashtrays from the Hollins cafeteria.  (Being bluestockings, we "purloined" things).  I have an ashtray set I just love -- one big coffee table size, and 4 little end table matches.  I have no use for them, but they draw me.  I almost put pipes in this category, but pipes are just Gross turned up to Forever.

Waiting.  People still say this all the time.  "I wish I smoked."  What a great time filler.  Nothing makes the MBTA come faster. 

Thinking.  And while you are waiting, all those constricted blood vessels making you even colder, with your hands full as it were, you have a minute to listen to yourself.  Runners and meditators get this too, but you know... screw them today.

Bumming.  Still the best pick up line, whether you are a grad student in the bar or a bum on the street.  One smoker can hardly refuse another.  Then again, they aren't 89 cents a pack anymore.  You can see how long it's been.

Menthol.  People used to claim they smoked menthols so no one would bum them.  Really it was because they taste like candy.  I can't explain why we smoked cloves.

The Buzz.  Oh, I'm not leaving you out, little buddy.  You used to be the nickel numb, but you're crazy expensive now.  I may have replaced you with the 3rd sip of bourbon.  But I think about you sometimes.





Let me close with the best thing ever said about why we smoke(d) when we smoke(d).

When We Smoked ~~ Liz Ahl


We were happier when we smoked, when we lit up,
toked a Camel between classes, or froze our asses off
on someone’s late December party porch.

We were happier when the cigarette box was crammed
into our pockets, when we socked away couch-cushion
change at the end of the month for the cheapest generics.

You say this to me: We were happier when we smoked,
you know. And yes, I know -- four months ago I stubbed
the last butt, smug as you can imagine. You say this to me

with the calm, shell-shocked voice of a wise survivor,
wide-eyed under the weight of knowing.
You grip my shoulders with your eyes for emphasis.

And if I were our therapist, I would ask what need
we had that nicotine filled like a perfect round peg,
what impediment to happiness blocked then

and still blocks our way like a storm-thrown tree,
but I’m not a shrink, and this isn’t therapy,
and I agree, we were happier when we smoked --

not just deluded. Not just younger. We took our smoke-
breaks round the clock and our days had more
than minutes -- the cigarettes that slowed time down

or those that sped it up as needed. The speed of a cigarette
is relative; we only know it gave us time and helped us push
the overly swollen hours to the side and behind, like a machete

hacking a clear path. If you were a therapist, reader,
you’d shake your head, make notes on your pad.
But you’re not. You’re you. And once, you were happier, too.

Thank you for asking

You were about to get an eyeful of bleh-bleh-work-stupid-what have I done with my life-yadda-myowmyow-tequila-rant rant....  It was bound to be completely irritating.

So thank you very much for asking questions in the comments.  I don't actually know how to answer them in the comments, given my comment structure.  How bloggy was that just now.

Let's go to the comment strip instead!

Do they still make Magic 8 Balls?

They do.  "They" are Tyco and they make several varieties, like everything these days, including white cheddar.  I broke mine open years ago to see what that damn thing looked like.  It looks like this: 

What about Men's Pocky?
Beats the hell out of me.  But looks like a bunch of men do eat it.

The Baroness asked for my Randolph House Chex Mix recipe.  Was it special?  Was it "magic"?  I think it was just salty.  And probably the recipe right off the box.  (Something else that comes in unnecessary flavors.)  What I remember is butter, W'shire sauce, maybe some Lawry's (oh... yeh... that s**t will kill you).  We drank a lot in Randolph House.

Karen shared a video of the Sesame Street "App for That" song.  If you didn't watch, I'll link it again.  And you can miss Joe Raposo.

Is "gender neutral" a compliment?
I think compared to "you walk like a guy," or "throw like a girl," sure.  It may be a backhanded compliment.  Or it may be that I rarely use the word Mommy.

Don't all girls conduct home repairs wearing a bikini and a hard hat?
Of course not, Charlene, that's for our tickle fights.  For home repair, we wear a sexy maid outfit.

About Marlo - did she speak, and do I like the book?
She did, but the people seated in the restaurant, who were not invited to the event taking place all around them, did not quiet for her -- specifically, the guy seated right behind me.  So I couldn't hear what she said.  I am saving the book for a long plane ride I have ahead. 

Aren't you sorry it's November?  really.. really... am.