Sunday, February 27, 2011

View from the bar

Down in the bunker – Red Carpet is on.  You might expect by now that I would be all about the live tweeting or the blogcasting, or whatever the kids are into these days.  The only reason I don't is that I don't keep Internet and television in the same room.  If you need a reason for that, you haven't been following this blog very closely.  Internet connection and a working fireplace would make this a very dangerous man-cave to be in, for sure.

But tonight is a night worthy of cranking up the heat to 70 degrees, which makes the room with the Internet in it almost unbearable, but makes me (almost) want to roll my sleeves up .  One layer of them, any way.

Let's not fire all the cylinders so early.  This is a long haul, and it is only 7:57 just now.  Look forward to seeing you over your Monday morning coffee.  I am pleased to discover I have NO meetings in the morning, the Boss is out for the day, and all the nonsense paperwork I usually am doing on a Sunday night can wait until tomorrow.  Bow---nuss.

My Plus-One tonight is Aziz Ansari, from Parks & Rec.  He is a TV guy, so we don't have proper seats.  We're hanging in the bar instead. Upside is, it means we won't be distracted, and he is small and wily enough to slip us through some tight crowds.

I'll admit I'm more excited this year than I have been in a long time – all of these actors have done such top-notch work, and the pack of  nominated films represent some ambitious film making.  Even the big popcorn movie, Inception (which you know I gave a pfffttt to) doesn't irritate me – say, like Avatar or LOTR did. Someone has to be there for the craft awards.   

So I won't have to stomp around no matter which title takes it home – but again, I am about 4 hours ahead of myself.

Is it odd that Flair Pens would pick this opportunity to have an ad campaign?  
 It's official:  TV no longer fits my square screen.

I loved Melissa Leo so much in Frozen River, and I really didn't think anyone even knew who she was.  Now everyone does, for sure.  Let this be a lesson to all of us.  Write a speech.  It's not bad luck, and it's not arrogant.  It is too bad for Hallie, who is in the wrong category, and now must wait a long time to make it there again. She would have been a lock in Best Actor. I see a long future for her, though, if she plays it right and keeps her head on straight.

Toy Story 3 is brilliant, and might as well win in the Best Animated Film category, since it won't win Best Picture – but How to Train Your Dragon is better animation.  Toy Story, though… better movie.

Like Helena Bonham-Carter, Aaron  Sorkin is one of those people a lot of people can’t stand.  Apparently, the director and/or conductor number among them.  And he can be kind of a prick.  But I want to have a long dinner with him someday.

Does it seem like everyone is distracted by something off screen?  Or is my TV just really that small?  Perhaps they have all been looking at Dame Helen Mirren.  Because daaaaayyy-um, sista.  

 If I ever get a chance to go in full0out formal drag, I am going to age up, rather than down I think.
Perhaps everyone is stoned.  Did California pass that marijuana bill? 

Christian Bale was a shoe-in, of course – more surprising is that he has never been nominated before.  I wanted him to thank Spielberg for Empire of the Sun, still completely riveting every time it comes around.

Cate Blanchett is dressed as an Alka-Seltzer.  Is this the right idea for Best Costume Design?  I need to find EW's wrap-up of this ceremony.  They will get to the bottom of these questions.  Speaking of which, I have not received my Hollywood issue of Vanity Fair – Paul suspects that my postman used it as a wheel stop.

I need proof that Michael Moore and Randy Newman are not the same person.
These Toy Story songs do tend to run together, though I don't think this one is as good as the first one.

The show has to end soon;  I only have 3 hours of battery left.  It seems to lack bones this year, like it keeps trying out different themes, then abandoning them.  The big GWTW opening was a tone-setter, then we just dropped it.  Maybe we'll ask people on the street what they like, or we'll pay tribute to Golden Age of Hollywood legends, then our Moms.  Or no, we'll be campy.  Let's roll out the orchestra again.

Let's sell more JCPenney.

Someone needs to confirm whether I should to pour a second glass of win.
Ugh.  Mondays. 

Now that Tom Hooper has the Oscar, please go see King's Speech and explain to me why everyone is positioned so far left in the frame.  I am pretty sure my TV would not display them.  The wallpaper is fascinating Tom, but do get on.  

Congratulations Natalie:  To smudge Queen Amidala from your mind, go rent The Professional, Beautiful Girls, and Closer. And this [explicit advisory, yo].

Colin:  Col-in, Col-in, Colin… Sometime between dignified Masterpiece Theatre Mainstay, and dreamy Weinstein stable boy, there was Bridget Jones,  Nanny McPhee , and heaven help us Mama Mia.  As Michael Caine taught us, for every Alfie, there are several Blame it On Rios and Jaws 3s.  So never get above your station.

I need to say this about The King's Speech – not to throw any shade, because it is fine strong film and you will enjoy it.  I recently saw Bertie & Elizabeth, which has none of the  strength The King's Speech is, but surprisingly similar in structure and dialogue, blowing the theory that the story was "waiting to be told" until Elizabeth the Queen passed on.  I'd like a WGA ruling on this if they could.  

 Does it seem like Spielberg gives out Best Picture a lot?  I would research that, but I need to go to bed.  You'll have to go on without me.  I would have gotten this up sooner, but I had to obsess for a while about whether I had drunk a bit of cork, and whether water would wash it down or cause it to swell in my throat and kill me.

March is upon us.  And with it, we hope, some renewed energy for this Expression Space.  Please don't hold me to it.  I crack under pressure. 


  1. I look forward to your annual Oscar commentary, and know it must have been exceptionally difficult this year with that boring show. I, too, was perplexed by the Flair pen ads throughout the awards show. I didn't even know they still made them! Maybe they were hoping to catch all the actors in the audience who use them to mark up their scripts.

  2. You're right about Cate's dress. It looked better up close, but mostly looked like a ring around her, er, breasts. Very odd, and what's with the yellow plastic beads? Did they run out of pink ones?

    You are the Oracle of Oscars, but I thought the story for years was the Academy passing over Spielberg for the directing award. You really think he had done it - presented - before? Interesting.

    Wondering how you liked Anne in tux? Can't remember the song, but I thought that was the highlight of a fairly dull evening. Well, and Melissa's f-bomb! I still think of her as a copy in Baltimore, so it was in [that] character!

  3. Spielberg has presented Best Picture 3 times -- all in the past 10 years.


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