1 If your act is going badly, turn it into a slapstick routine.
2 Offer your visitors a drink.
3 Cousins look exactly alike.
4 Before you hatch a plan, get into a huddle and mumble. Someone should be a lookout.
5 Never take care of your friend's pet.
6 It's not what you think.
7 The cool character is really very lonely
8 Nazis and Romans had British accents.
9 Your third guess is right (see Law & Order, House, CSI)
10 Between 1960 and 1970, everyone was widowed.
11. Roasts and cookies always burn. Salad never wilts.
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Want to know how to keep a roast from burning? Buy one large and one small and put them in the oven together. When the small one burns, the big one is ready to eat. M
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