From the wings

If the Drawing In Room has any traditions, it may be my annual Oscar blogcast play-by-play, which is written live, even if posted shortly after the fact.
2009, 2008, 2007


I wondered if I should attempt the same with the Emmys, even though I stopped watching broadcast TV about 2 years ago. I weaned slowly -- Grey's Anatomy kept me hooked for a few seasons, until I found you could watch it on-line. And the Office, 30 Rock, and really... it's cold down there where the TV is.

So I upped my Netflix count, unhooked the VCR (so quaint, Amish) and gave it up.
But I do love my awards shows. I still love the buzz of the new TV season, even if it is hard to find the freshness under the reality, procedurals, and vampires.

When Neil Patrick Harris himself asked me to tune in (by way on an ad on 60 Minutes, which I don't watch either. You can get it on podcast.) I thought I would join the culture, if only for a few hours.

And guess what I forgot: Massachusetts got a Senate race in it! And a Mayor's race. And a Governor's race. Oh, dear MY, will this be a long evening. For your amusement, I will try to tally the # of appeals and approvals.

Here... we...go.

[8:00] Opening number is a gas, complete with white sport coat.
Vanessa: why you be hatin' the glasses gag? When I was a college freshman, we got our whole floor to wear hats for the group photo. Maybe a good sport woulda won.

People's voting? Oh, ATAS, why stoop so low? We already have that awards show.
Scoring the Emmys is a pretty good get for CBS, who gets to plug all their own shows during the breaks (when not selling me a Senator). CBS has not been king for a very long time, even though they ruled the airwaves during my childhood.

Justin Timberlake is starting to look like Ryan Phillipe. Now that's a sammich.


I think I could have lived my whole live without hearing Toni Collette's real voice. How does someone win the Emmy and get such little applause in the hall? That's weird.


CBS is going to get some angry letters about the Family Guy segment.

I really don't care for reality shows, and I'll tell you why.


10. I am not very competitive by nature. I am not at all competitive about rooting for other people where sports are not involved.
9. Judges are mean. Isn't it enough to make yourself vulnerable to strangers and discover you are unqualifies for your life's dream, without being ridiculed too?

8. The crazy production values with the long pauses, flashing lights, cliffhanger commercial breaks and schizophrenic interior design.

7. These people are not celebrities. Stop it, America

6. "I'm not here to make friends."

5. Day-after quarterbacking around the office. I recognize that if I watched these shows AND if I enjoyed them, I would enjoy this too. But there you are.

4. Tension played for entertainment. I have medical shows for that, thank you.

3. D list TV actors and former child stars make me sad

2. I predict a merging of dating/professional intervention/competition shows very soon

1. Jon Kate

Reality Host is a category? CBS 2010 program note: So you think you can Host.

9:00pm The Windows 7 commercial has aired twice already. One of its reviews praises it as "Stable."
Blink. Blink.

9:15pm Possibly the first academy acknowledgement of an organ donation.

I invite all Netflix members to rediscover the golden age of TV mini-series - 1978-1988.

Another list:

1. Roots - but of course

2. East of Eden - ACTING!
3. Centennial4. North & south - RIP, Patrick

5. Thorn Birds - KISS ME ON MY MOUTH!

6. Shogun

7. one more Richard Chamberlin - Count of Monte Cristo

8. Little Women

9. Rich Man, Poor Man

10. Backstairs at the white House

9:30pm Award Show rule #1: the film with Nazis in it will win

I found myself wondering recently what Winston Churchill would sound like in an ordinary
conversation, say at breakfast. Asking if the dry cleaning was ready to be picked up that day.
We should make one of those "first family" comedy albums featuring Winston Churchill, Eleanor Roosevelt, and Edward R Morrow at a spa.


Casting note: Put Patricia Arquette and Glen Close in a mother/daughter film. Call HBO.  Also Charlize Theron and Katherine Heigl. Get back to me.

Speaking of Katherine Heigl. I have not seen too many of the Grey's crew here tonight. A more faithful viewer would know who was nominated. I did fall hard for the season closer, but I don't know if I will remember to watch next Sunday.


Does America "get" Neil Patrick Harris? This tone is awfully "coastal."


Explore Dr Horrible on your own time.


9:33pm Jessica Lange flashes a little tat under her jewelry. I count on Entertainment Weekly
to get to the bottom of this for us in their re-cap. A real Blogger would have the connections to look into it live -- or even a live connection -- but that's not what you come here for, is it?

Why DO you come here?


On this commercial break, I would like to tell you about a new pita chip made by Cedar's. Do not eat them -- unless they are dipped in queso.


Sprint's commercial is set in the Guggenheim, where I am fairly sure you can not take or make a phone call.

10:00pm - political checkpoint. Only (1) each Mayor, Governor, Senator ad. Mayor for life Tom Menino wants to remind you that in your adult years of civic awareness, he has always been mayor. don't mess with it.

10:11pm - The Windows ad... one more time.

10:15pm DRAMA

or... Cops, Lawyers, Docs, and other franchises


You know, this show really isn't as fun as the Globes. More alcohol please.

I am sorry that Chandra Wilson is considered a Supporting Actress. She had such a presence in the first 2 seasons of Grey's. If I had been on Facebook then, she would have been my profile pic.


Matthew Weiner has a wife.
Huh.

One of the CSIs should do an episode where the victim appears to have been killed by a vampire, but it is revealed that the wings of an Emmy were the actual weapon.

10:45pm. Not much longer now. I will predict the guy who plays Dexter, you know, David Fisher.
Man, I miss Six Feet Under. I may have to watch that all over again.


Predicting Mad Men for drama; 30 Rock for comedy. This is the honor system.
Great cable series you should look into if you have been living without cable


1. Sopranos

2. Six Feet Under

3. Big Love

4. Weeds

5. Entourage. I haven't seen it myself. But everyone says you should.


I will have to read more about Elisabeth Moss and Fred Armisen.

Happy New Season, America.

You made that up

Talking with a friend the other day about our gripes and ailments (as middle-aged ladies start to do) and she says, "...so they were going to put me on Effexor, and..."

I jumped the track:  "Effexor?  Like Affects Her?  They named a drug that?"

And they colored it pink, which we have all been trained is the new empowerment color for women, because anything that color can actually cure cancer.  Even when it's a vaccum cleaner.

I immediately added Effexor to my list of we-give-up product names, where pharmaceuticals reign supreme.  You'll recall my discovery of Veramyst, the drug that admits in its name they don't know how it works.

#1 on this list is Anusol.
In the Marketing bullpen: "Tommy, you're not getting it.  Listen.  It's a solvent.... for....?"

Remember when Claritin came out and for weeks the commercial never told you what it was for?  Just convinced you that it would make everything sunshiney.  Was it an allergy drug?  An antidepressent?  A trial separation?  Claritin was the first of the "maybe I should ask my doctor" advertisements that lulled us with lists of "rare" side effects that sound the same or worse than the condition we were treating.

Cialus is a good one.  I see Alice, right over there in the adjoining bathtub.  She helped me move them outside.  I could not confirm what "cialis" literally means, but I did discover that its generic name is tadalafil, as if the usual Gang of Idiots at Mad Magazine went to work for Lilly:

"Honey....?" (gestures) "Ta-da!"  (hands on hips) "La FILL!"

tadalafil.  you made that up.

Here's one George Bush named: Abilify.   I bet Bristol-Myers was surprised to find this name hadn't been used already.  Like hurricane forecasters, these poor souls have to slog through lists of brand names for an original idea.  Why this name does everything!  They can sell it later.  It is a schizophrenia drug.

I have always enjoyed the sound of Keflex.  It's a Serbian spy ring.  Or a watch brand.  Actually, the sound of you coughing up whatever is infecting your lungs.  Everyone of these drugs has its own website.  Now that I have visited them all, I expect a more entertaining class of ad on my Facebook home page than "You are fat, single, and should go back to school."

Know what would make me feel better?  A big dose of Boostrix.  This is what she looks like.

There are dozens of drug with "flu" in their name.  Fluzone seems to be a counter-productive choice.  I learned that "influenza" itself is just a made up name for the "influence" of bad humors, in the way that "lunacy" came from moonlight.  And I think you get worms from going barefoot and cooties from eating off your brother's plate.

Antabuse is a name that says it like it is.  Like Anusol, it doesn't try to speak Greek or sound "atomic."  Oh, you want abuse... I'll give you some abuse....

I started not to link to this ad, because it is not a good quality YouTube example - there is some "TRIAL VERSION" branding on it.  But look around it, because this is brilliant.

Not all who wander are lost

Says my Life is Good t-shirt.

I had never been moved by Life is Good, a cute little company with a Jot the Dot sensibility. I do not golf, or own a dog, and while I enjoy the beach, it is not the element that calls me. I am more Earth and/or Air than Water.

Then one day there was a brown (brown!) t-shirt with a drawing of my own hiking boots and the slogan, "Not all who wander are lost." I found out later the line is attributed to Tolkein (not that there's anything wrong with that...). I bought it, caught up in the consumer-glow of vacation giddiness.

Today I sweated through one side and the mosquitoes bit through the other on a 3 hr ramble through Upton State Forest. (Why I Hike.)

The Governor's Council of Get off the Couch has designated certain state trails as Heart Healthy (read: strenuous) and Upton has a couple of them. Based on their incline, or length, or both, they are a good substitute for the gym on these crystal days of September, and much less expensive (donations accepted).

Upton is 2000 acres in southeastern MA near the Whitehall Reservoir, which is no longer a reservoir, so more of a lake. Dogs are allowed, which makes it more crowded than others, but most of the family traffic was arriving as I was leaving. I did not see any black bears, despite the giant warning sign at the trailhead. Bears? Holy..... bears.




Upton's got a cabin in it! You have to sing that. like Harold Hill. Have I wandered again...?





Here now, a long quote:

"Upton State Forest is home to three remaining Civilian Conservation Corps (CCC) camp buildings with an intact parade ground and an identifiable footprint of the original camp. In 2003 a fourth building collapsed from snow load. In 2005 Preservation Mass listed the CCC Camp as one of the Ten Most Endangered Historic Resources in Massachusetts.
Each year a partnership with the Friends of Upton State Forest, DCR CCC Program Committee and the Upton third grade teachers brings students to the camp for a Day in the Life of the CCC. The Friends hold events, themed hikes and vernal pool workshops using the camp as a base. "

In the past life where I was not killed in the Triangle Shirtwaist Fire, I was a skinny loner boy in the CCC. I was too smart for my own good, and the fellas called me Perfesser. I suppose not much has changed.

I came off the trail bow-legged and bone weary. Put my overshirt on the car seat so I wouldn't get it sweaty. I was soaked through my jeans and dotted with mosquito welts. Now it's Miller Time.

Big Loaf at Finder's Pub, which is (hold onto something) a slice of meatloaf inside a grilled cheese. And a Miller Lite, which I realize is Beer Soda, but I want that "drinkability" they talk about around Big US Breweries. They mean carbonated. Like a beer soda. Goes down gooooood.

I sat right there in my Sweaty McSweaty-ness, mind clear and body worked, eating God's own sandwich and considering the day very well spent. Very well spent, indeed.

This song has no title

When did this magazine become a weekly, anyway?

About the time 3 days ago when I started this post, only to have Blogger flake out and revert-save to an earlier version. Or maybe I did, but if that is a setting, I have no idea where it is. The "lose my stuff" setting.

This is the part of the show where I usually drop by with a lot of whining about how I haven't written lately, then cram everything I have been thinking about into one nonsensical post that shows all lack of editing and preparation. "Thinking is Writing," we used to say at the writing lab, which I never believed for a second. Thinking is Thinking. Rebecca Faery used to say, "you know you're a writer because you write it down."

Here's what I've been working out:

Playing Pandora on multiple browser tabs to see if I can either a) create a Round, b) discover a new style of Mixin. I think if you had beats on one and Aerosmith on the other, you might accidentally become Run DMC.

I heard the Reverend Run on NPR's Wait, Wait, Don't Tell me this weekend. I don't know what that augers, but it seems like something, doesn't it?

I made that picture just now while listening to my Pandora "Maeve" station. I think Run would want it that way.

I caused a stir in Facebook nation this past week by updating my profile pic to an actual picture of my contemporary self. I also experimented with opensalon.com for about 2 seconds before I realized that was too public for me, and for the same reasons I upgraded my picture. So I back-pedaled, and if I can figure out the import/export protocol, I can export/import The DrawingIn Room to Salon for some more exposure.

To tell the truth, I am not especially motivated to do it. I think I don't believe I would get an audience, and I can be rejected on my own time. I might challenge Rebecca and say you know you're a writer when people read it.

I can't stay ahead of the news curve before the blogosphere becomes saturated (talking to you, Salon....) I look at the front page of Opensalon and I think, I don't know that I have anything to add here. Not even a(n) LOLcat.

A friend's husband says we are supposed to pronounce that "Loll"...not spell it out "L-O-L." I said, "Eyem-ho, you're a pia. Jik."

But let's talk about Joe Wilson, shall we? This is a great sentence from Salon, moments after he cat-called the President and no one L'd O.L: "Wilson also reportedly called the White House to apologize; he spoke to Chief of Staff Rahm Emanuel." How would you like to call to apologize to the President, and instead get Rahm Emanuel? There's a tweet I want to follow. Poor Joe thought he was in Parliament for a second. Pelosi looked like she was about to take off her shoe. Where's your safe word now?

You want to know what I think about health care? I live in Massachusetts. They think of it for you. I'm not particular about who pays my doctor $200 to see her for five minutes; wake me when they start investigating why it costs $200. One post I never finished was about how my insurance wouldn't cover 8 Vitamin caps because it was considered a 2-month supply, and they only cover 1.

Other things I have not reported/commented on because it is already old news is the passing of The Senator. It gave me the shakes, I tell you, and not because Ted and I were so close.

What flipped me out was the logistical planning of his funeral on a move-in Saturday in The Fenway during a tropical storm. How would they manage the traffic? And there would be all these old people, who require drop-off and parking considerations, and in that rain.... well, they would have to get one of those long funeral home canopies, wouldn't they? Keep in mind that I am in no way responsible for coordinating this event. It is just where my brain goes.



the shakes I had were shamrock!

Let me pause a moment here to say that Blogger's other bug at present is something off with its search engine, preventing me from finding easily the posts I want to link back to.


I have probably gone on long enough. The first night I wrote this, it took an hour. After I had lost that hour I thought a while about whether I needed to reconstruct it. I thought it was pretty funny. I had also had a cocktail. And I finally decided that I had gotten what I wanted from it, and it is all about me, isn't it? I guess that decision wasn't actually final.

Overheard downstairs by Curt Shilling's place, where his coder boys come and go in packs. They play a lot of Ultimate Frisbee and look as if they would head for California if not for their intense love of baseball and sweat-shorts. As they are walking into the office, one says to the other, "That's when fine art was commercial art." Ah... Bach.

There hasn't been a Mill Update lately because it is just too bleak. Plus they cut off our access and dared us to bypass the flimsy gates they put up. It is the equivalent of writing "Do not Open! Private!" on your composition book. I think Harriet M Welsh could tell us a thing or two about how breakable that lock is. So I'll just come home and blog about them. Do they think I have no workarounds?


I job hunt like other people fold down pages in catalogs.


I've been getting a whole lot of Rock Star of late, in a way that may require a proctologist to remedy. Today I said, as I slogged yet again to her door (all of 25 steps from my cage), "I really need to move closer to your office." Her face showed that she didn't get what I was driving at, so I explained, "It's just too far to walk." Longer beat. (haha. I'm funny. Please don't kill me.) She says, "Oh, see, I look forward to those opportunities."

:01 PAUSE, then I can only say, "Of...course you do."

By the end of the day with sass-o-meter cranked to 11, and The Boss MIA-PTO, I came back to the door and said, "It's a thankless job, so I have come to get some."

She: "Thank you."
Me: "You're welcome."I'll take what I can get.

Happy Labor Day

In the spirit of the holiday, The DrawingIn Room builds your

Labor Day Movie Marathon
salute to labor-management relations

Office Space: Foundation and Pinnacle of the working-movie canon

Gung Ho: "YOO ESS AY" gets brought low by the former enemy

Backdraft: Even superheroes have bulls*** meetings to go to

Swimming with Sharks: Put your worst boss stories up against this guy

The Devil Wears Prada: ditto - in heels

The Turning Point: what happens when Labor wakes up and finds itself Management

GI Jane: If you have to fight this hard for your promotion, it may not be worth getting

A League of Their Own: When the playing field is level, everyone can achieve

Pirates of Silicon Valley: In case you're thinking, "I'll just start my own company"

Wall Street: How you like it NOW, fellas?

Matewan: None of us is stronger than all of us

The Finishing School's guide to Working Women movies
Part 1
Part 2


Alternative theme
The Nutty Professor
The King of Comedy
Three on a Couch
Cinderfella
The Geisha Boy
It's a Mad (etc) World